mikefotis.com

Happy Friday!

1. Day three of no access via MPLS Wi-Fi.  I’m sure that others are having a lovely time with it, but not me. So I am stuck with two other options. Get comcast and be ok with a company that 5 years ago told me over the phone that I didn’t exist. That’s of course, assuming that 5 years later they’d accept my physical being. Their plan is kind of expensive, it took me 20 minutes to find out what internet would actually cost* after my first 3 months, and there’s a buttload of set up fees.

Then there’s Qwest. Their deal is the best until I tried to order the service and was nailed with set up fees 3x’s more expensive than my monthly rate would be.

Ugh.

2. Thanks to everybody who attended Creature Feature last night. It was the second most attended CF in history! The Survivors of the Undead Plague-with whom I’m playing-have had, in my opinion, three really solid sets. It’s been really fun playing with those guys (and working with Fred), although I feel like I’ve been in my head for most of it. What a fun experience it has been to be able to play with 3 talented improvisers in a format that I’m not super comfortable playing in.  I’ve been really impressed at Troy, Damian and Tim’s ability to keep the form going forward while they carry my heavy ass behind them.

As for Creature Feature, what can I say? Those guys are amazing. Last night’s set was a testament to that.

3. Hey! New two BNW podcasts are up! One episode is dedicated solely to The Beatles.  The other is a funny look at our economic woes. Enjoy!

4. Jenny Lewis’ new album, Acid Tongue is pretty great. If you like Neko Case, then you’ll like this. Maybe. I don’t know what you like, even after all these years, which is probably why we didn’t work.  Look, Elvis Costello is on a track. What else do you need?

Have a lovely weekend!

Mike

*Fuck you and your introductory rates. Just give me the price, k?

Happy Thursday! I am writing this from the manufactured coziness of a Caribou Coffee because my home internet once again refuses to work. Maybe it’s better in other areas, but as far as I’m concerned MPLS Wi-Fi can slip on a banana peel that’s coated in shit.  Anyway…

1.  I know there have been about one million cold bugs floating around our fine city this fall, but has anyone else had the (at least) 3 week long cold? It’s not the worst cold in the world. I’m a little fatigued all the time, my head is always a little stuffed and achy and last night I developed a cough.  The annoying part is that for every five days of being ill, I get two days where I feel almost better only to get walloped immediately thereafter.  Oh well. Shit happens.

2.  Hey! Creature Feature continues tonight at 8pm at the BNW! Get your tickets for this always above average show!

Happy Wednesday!

1. So, I spent last night and this morning reading the cookbooks I have and realizing how little I know about actual cooking, which has actually gotten me even more excited for this thing! Woo hoo!  Here’s a wrap up of the cbooks I have:

-Alton Brown’s book: Very science-y-ish. Goes really in depth about things that I’m sure are important but interest me in no way whatsoever.

-Emeril’s book: Very “BAM!” and I can’t decide whether that’s a good thing or not. Also, he shamelessly hawks his signature sauces and spices in every recipe. The stuff in this cbook seem pretty hardcore and way out of my league.  Still, he does provide an excellent index of sauces that seem easy enough to make.

-Rachel Ray’s book: Actually not too bad. Plus I still think she’s hot,  voice made of nails and glass be damned.

-Betty Crocker’s book: This shit is the bible. It lacks all flash which makes it a bit of a dull read, but I have a feeling if I ever sit down with it, it will be far and away the most helpful of the books I have.

If I were playing fuck, marry or kill with these books, I would definitely marry Betty Crocker, Fuck Emeril (flipped a coin between Emeril and Rachel. Came up heads, what can I say?) and kill Alton.

2. Creature Feature #3 is tomorrow night! 8pm! BNW! Seriously, I’d get my tickets now.

Mike

Happy Tuesday!

1.  Thanks to the brilliance of one of my readers (Melissa!), I have been inspired to write a cookbook. Actually, I’ve always wanted to write something similar (Anthony Bourdain is a hero for Christ’s sake) and have been kicking the idea of a show/book/story about me and cooking around for a while, but this seals the deal. Exactly ONE person I know likes the idea of me writing a cookbook. Exactly NO ONE I know likes the idea of me writing anything else. So, cookbook wins. I’ve actually got a pretty great idea for all of this. I can’t really cook. I like what I make but I wouldn’t wish how it looks to the naked eye on anyone.  Oh man, this is gonna be really funny. Woo hoo! National Novel Writing Month has now turned into National Kind Of Cookbook Writing Month!

2. Good news! For the next three Thursdays Creature Feature featuring The Survivors Of The Undead Plague will be at 8pm at the Brave New Workshop! That’s right, that’s 2 hours earlier than the previous 2 weeks.  The 8pm shows are the ones that are going to sell really well, so if I were you, I’d get tickets ahead of time.

Happy Monday!

Man, this sure was a boring weekend for yours truly. In fact I didn’t do much of anything.  I did make a loaf of meat yesterday. It was delicious. Here’s the recipe:

1. 2 pounds lean ground turkey. Or whatever meat you want. Turkey’s good for you though. That’s all I’m saying.  Put it in a bowl.

2. 1 one. Maybe 2, depending on how much you like eggs and buy into the theory that they bind things. Crack and put the delicious yummies into the bowl.

3. Onions. Dice them. I used like, I don’t know, half of one? I bought a pre-diced onion because I am fucking lazy. Put that diced goodness in the bowl.

4. Add some spinach to that bowl!

5. Hey! Toss in anywhere between 1 to 14 cups of Italian seasoned breadcrumbs. That’s what I did.

6. Mix it together. Put “loaf of meat” in a baking pan.  Smear ketchup on top. Cook the loaf of meat for 35 minutes. Assume it’s done. Get all excited.  Slice loaf of meat open. Note the raw texture of the inside of your meatloaf. Think about eating raw loaf of meat.  Then picture your funeral and the jokes that would be made at your expense.  Glumly decide to bake loaf of meat for another 35 minutes. Go play some more video games and pretend not to be worthless.  That’s what I did. Or, just bake the fucking thing for an hour like the cookbook said.

7. After the second round of baking, your loaf should be done. Unless your oven is retarded. If this is the case, go to White Castle.

8. Lump slices of loaf of meat onto the white trashiest white bread buns you can find. Cub Foods sells them at 12 a package for 30 cents.  Cover entire thing in ketchup.  Eat 7-8 servings. Stare at the TV for the rest of the night and wonder why you are so alone in a city of 300,000.

Mike