No Meat for This Fotis. Not For A Week Anyway.
Happy Monday! It’s been a while, huh? What can I say other than for about two weeks, I had absolutely nothing to say. But now I…drum roll please…do!
1. For the next week, I’m going to engage in a little experiment. I’m not going to eat any meat. No red meat, no chicken, no fish, no nothing. The only food I will be eating will be of the “not meat” variety.
Why are you doing this, Mike? Meat is delicious.
Good question, me. I’m doing this because I have what is known as a “Fotis Stomach”. It can’t handle anything, especially the delicious flesh of animals. I’m going to try this for a week to see if I start to feel better. And by better, I mean less like I have a brick in my stomach. A brick that’s covered in acid and acid proof scorpions.
For the next week, this blog will be a day by day journal of my trials and sorrow. I love meat. This may be impossible.
Mike
I bet your week off was due to the fact that there’s no more Top Chef. You were just so GD sad.
This puts your nickname in grave danger. “Tofu” Fotis doesn’t quite cut it.
Snarky comment: I give you 24 hours before you start fantasizing about bacon.
Real comment: You’re probably gluten intolerant. It’s pretty common… Have you looked into a gluten-free diet?
Have you tried Prilosec? Did we already talk about this once a long time ago? Prilosec saved me.
Even fish? Fish is so nothing like other meat it’s hardly meat.
I think I could easily be a vegetarian but I could never ever give up fish.
Red meat does have to literally rot in your stomach a little bit before it can be digested, so the brick may be real.
Ben-You’re partially right.
Scott-Nicknames take time to develop.
Kevin-I don’t even know what gluten is. Stop making up words.
Katharine-Prilosec is indeed a life saver. I love it. It’s the reason sriracha and I are still such good friends.
LDH-After this week is up, I fully plan on bringing chicken and fish and turkey back into my life. At moderate levels. Guys, seriously…I eat WAY more than I should.
Kevin is right. I went gluten-free for three weeks and it was an absolute miracle. Then I saw a cupcake and I reverted back to the pain and agony that is my destiny. Totally worth it if it means I get to eat cake.
Fear the wheat!
Mike! Do you want to borrow my “Self-Healing Cookbook?” It’s totally meat-free and has so many wonderful, delicious dishes to try! I could package it up with the Feng Shui book.
I think you should eat your cowboy boots.
some other foods to think about trying to cut out/down on if stopping the consumption of delicious, tasty flesh doesn’t calm the gut-demons are high acid foods such as citrus and cutting out tomatoes in ALL forms. Soup, salsa, ketchup, raw, fried green nummy bits…all of it. if the tummy still protests with acid reflux of doom despite the lack of meat then please consider trying out a diet free of tomato and tomato based products.
Or the gluten-thing. Celiac’s disease is becoming WAY more common and there is a ton of food out there made gluten-free for peeps like you. BUT either way, no matter what you do, see your doctor if you have one. You could just end up making yourself sicker if you’re not careful whenever you make a drastic dietary change.
Good luck~
Funny, I just took a break from making gluten free/casein free banana muffins (with cinnamon frosting, mind you) to read this blog. It’s honestly deliciousness. And if I can make it work, anyone can.